Ma’am is a contraction of madam, a French word which refers to a woman who is older, as opposed to mademoiselle, the word denoting a woman who is young. In English “ma’am” is used for the older woman and “miss” for the younger one.
About ten to fifteen years ago, people stopped referring to me as “miss” and began referring to me as “ma’am.” However, this is a misunderstanding of who I am as a person, and these people are mis-aging me. I am not an older woman. Though I am AMA3B (assigned middle-age at 30th birthday), the age I was assigned does not match my internal age. I have never felt old, my entire life, and I am not old. I am literally young. No one can imagine the inner struggle I’ve felt as I’ve looked in the mirror and watched my body take on a foreign aged look that I have never identified with. I’ve often considered surgery to correct this defect. But I can’t afford surgery, so I do my best by shopping in the junior’s department, so that people will understand I’m presenting young.
Some may take the appearance of my body and face as evidence that I am older, but these people need educated on the many different ways that a young person can look.
You see, age is a spectrum. Some people are clearly 10, and that’s young, and some people are clearly 90, and that’s old, but in between are many, many other types of ages. And who is to say that a person whose bodily appearance suggests they’ve been on the Earth 48 years (or even 78 years) is old? The fact is, you can’t tell. Some 20 year-olds have wrinkles, and some 60-year-olds don’t. Remember, there is that disorder where people age prematurely, and there is also that one woman who got osteoporosis at 27. Since you haven’t given me a chromosome test, you have no business making a judgment about how old I am. I know what I am, and others need to believe me.
So I’m going to need everyone on my college campus and in my life in general to ban the word “ma’am” from their vocabulary when referring to me, and to begin using the word “miss.” I consider the word “ma’am,” when used for me, to be hate speech. However, it is perfectly acceptable to continue using the word for cis-aged people.
By the way, avoiding using either word is not an option as that is un-aging me and denying my humanity as a young person. I have the right to exist.
Some people, like University of Toronto professor Jordan Peterson, think that one person’s rights end where another’s begin, and that what I am proposing is “compelled speech” backed by the force of law, which is unconstitutional. But that’s bigotry and trans-agesim. I deserve to have my youthfulness recognized under the law. And that can happen only when you say exactly what I need for you to say.
Next post: why the twenty-year-olds on OK Cupid need to examine their trans-ageist dating preferences.